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While learning to play the guitar, I had some powerful realizations about the romantic relationships in my life.

This is a confessional piece about a recent…[ummm manic]…online dating episode I had a few weeks ago. Now take that pull, that force, give it digitized-crack and red-bull and make it accessible at an instant.Retrospectively, I know why meditation is important to me. This is what I experienced after one weekend of online dating.Almost two years ago now I attended a series of lectures by Prof.Richard Gombrich which I find still resonating around in my psyche. Gombrich talked about was his disappointment that his article in which he had discovered the 'true' dates of the Buddha had not attracted any attention from the scholarly community.The idea here is that when Upāli finished collected the Vinaya immediately after the Buddha's death he placed a dot on the manuscript.

Each subsequent year a further dot was added to keep track of the years.No longer do I feel like the stakes are against me, nor do I feel the frustration I felt for years on end.When learning to play guitar, I wanted to play multiple songs right away. We often equate having fun with having it all right away.How exactly do you even meet anyone if you aren’t looking?Does someone accidentally fall on you in the grocery store?As I re-call my experience I will make these reflections clear through topics affectionately called “vignettes de crazy”. Because of this experience I am now grappling with the following questions: what drives me to look for romantic love?